I am not as emotionally robust as many others I know, especially when it comes to my own work.
I have researched deeply and I know that disappointment and discouragement are a normal part of any writer’s journey. But knowing something intellectually, and preparing your heart for the attack, are very different ballgames. I can prepare my mind with relative ease, but my heart is a strange mystery to me.
I have studied my heart from every angle, and most of the time I convince myself that I have it well-understood. But then I can look back at patterns of avoidance and discouragement, and I realize my heart has been steering me away from a wound and I was oblivious.
This is where I am now, I have been avoiding writing for about a year now, because I just don’t have the emotional robustness that this path needs…
Does that mean my stories and story-ideas should be abandoned?
Of course not!
But I guess I needed a break.
Perhaps I won’t ever be published, I’ll have to console myself that I had good ideas, but not the right personality type to bounce back well enough to sell them. I’m not a salesman. I’m just me.
Maybe I’ll grow stronger in the future (this is always my hope)…
Blessings and Hopes that you are stronger,
Sarah